Wayne's Audition

From Inspecting Carol

By Daniel Sullivan and

The Seattle Repertory Theatre Resident Company

Wayne:You want me to join the acting company?  What do I say?

(He thinks a moment)

You know, you can be going along thinking you're successful but then what kind of success can it possibly be if you're not going where your body and soul are telling you to go?  You have to follow your bliss. When you follow your bliss, you come to bliss. You have to cross that threshold. Believe me, I know. And yet, I don't know. Because to know is not to know. And not to know is to know You know?

I think before we go ahead with this, I should do my audition. You have to know what you're getting. Please. You deserve this, at least

(All in one breath, adrenalin pushing him through this, greatly exceeding the awfulness of his previous performance.)

Now is the winter of our discontent

Made glorious summer by this sun of York;

And all the clouds that loured upon our house

In the deep bosom of the ocean buried.

Now are our brows bound with victorious wreaths,

Our bruiséd arms hung up for monuments,

Our stern alarums changed to merry meetings,

Our dreadful marches to delightful measures.

Grim-visaged War hath smoothed his wrinkled front,

And now, instead of mounting barbéd steeds

To fright the souls of fearful adversaries,

He capers nimbly in a lady's chamber

To the lascivious pleasing of a lute.

(Deep Breath)

Thank you Thank you. You know, I've been to fifty-three theaters in the last twenty-five days. I don't know if you're the best... but you sure are the nicest!